LØLØ: “I’m so over-emotional and over-sensitive. I can be the most confident person one day and the most insecure person the next second”

There are very few of us out there who truly get to live out our rockstar dreams. While we might dream about playing on stage in front of thousands of fans night after or releasing a hit album and touring it all over the world, the reality is very different.

For one such artist, LØLØ, that dream became a reality and, having transitioned from wanting to be a Broadway star to sitting in her basement performing Green Day’s multi-million selling album American Idiot, that dream sees her touring all over the world with her pop-punk idols.

In our latest Cover Story, V13 chatted to Canadian alt-rock/pop-punk star LØLØ about her new album, falling for robots and wishing i was one, how she deals with imposter syndrome, and what it feels like to go from singing in your bedroom to being put onto Green Day’s guest list.

Your musical career started out in tap and acting classes as a kid. Where did that start out?

“So my Grandfather used to play these Shirley Temple videos and one of my memories was watching those videos with him. I just wanted to be Shirley Temple, my hair was exactly like hers I literally looked like little orphan Annie unfortunately, so I just like wanted to be her.

I wanted to tap, sing, perform. I just like loved all of that and at the time I thought that would eventually take me to Broadway, which was my dream. At the same time, I also was really into Green Day and Avril Lavigne, but I’d never thought that I would be able to do that. I loved it. I loved performing concerts of American Idiot in my basement. However, going to be on Broadway one day is like what I saw for myself.”

You’ve talked about your Granddad, what was the encouragement from your family into a musical or a creative career?

“They were definitely supportive. I was always in the school plays and they were always super-stoked about that. I don’t think anyone thought that I would actually end up doing this as my career. My dad’s definitely disappointed about that. I can tell you that but my mom’s really supportive.

No-one thought I was going to actually end up doing it so they were supportive to an extent, but then when I started doing things, they were like, “wait, what’s going on?” I remember when I first got my tour offer to tour with Simple Plan, they were “wait, huh? They want you to go with them? Simple Plan? The band that you would always listen to, they want you to go with them? Why?” and I was like, “dude, I don’t know.” Yeah, it was definitely like, all of a sudden I feel like I just woke up and I was actually an artist, like a legitimate one.

I always feel like such a poser. I feel like we all have imposter syndrome so, whenever I’m at one of my concerts, and I’m backstage, it feels like this isn’t a real concert. It took me a really long time to realize like what is going on here.”

“I always feel like such a poser. I feel like we all have imposter syndrome so, whenever I’m at one of my concerts, and I’m backstage, it feels like this isn’t a real concert.”

In terms of Green Day and Simple Plan and bands like that. Everybody had that one song or one artist that you connected with as that transition from one lifestyle to another. Who was that for you? Or what was the song?

“I feel like the American Idiot album was my thing that I just front to back would put it on in my basement and do performances and put a little tie on and think I want to be Billie-Joe Armstrong and Avril Lavigne. I literally wore the tie and I wore cargo pants and spiky bracelets which is funny because I still dress like that. But, as a kid, I was dressing like that which is funny so I would say that was definitely the album where I knew I would love to be this. If I had to choose one album that has been the most influential in my life as an artist, it would be that.”

A lot of people when they discover that song or particular album, whatever form of music it is, it’s a “this really speaks to me” kind of moment. What was it about that album?

“It’s so crazy because I don’t know why I picked it. I always ask my Mom. Did I choose this or did you buy this for me? How did this happen? How did I get into this type of music? She would always tell me she didn’t know. “I think you like picked it at the CD store because of the red heart,” and I always joke it was definitely like “Oh, a red heart, I’m gonna pick this.”

I literally don’t remember what it was about it, but I just remember loving it, and I remember going on YouTube, when YouTube was a thing, and I remember watching the “Basket Case” video, and I just remember staring at it thinking “this is so fucking cool.”

Again, I don’t know what it was about it, something just really clicked with that kind of thing and then Avril Lavigne was also a huge one like. There’s a video that always goes around of me making up a dance to “Sk8er Boi” where I’m wearing a wifebeater and a tie and i’m doing the most cringe, the worst dance. “He was a boy. She was a girl…”, literally. I’m wearing my nerdy glasses that I was used to have and I just looked like such a freak but it’s very cute looking back. Now, at the time, I was so not cool. I definitely thought it was so cool but I was not cool.”

V13 – MagazineCover – Issue59 – LØLØ

If you want a cool Green Day fact, Green Day played one of their first ever shows in the UK in a working man’s club near my Mom and Dad’s in 1991. They did a nativity play. The full show is on YouTube.

“Wow. I wasn’t even a thought yet. My parents didn’t even know each other yet. That’s crazy. It’s so wild to me. I actually recently saw them. They played at the Echoplex in LA, which is, I think, 700 capacity. They did a special pop-up show and they did Dookie front to back, then American Idiot front to back, and then some new ones. I think it was probably a practice show for them for their big tour.

I got put on the list with some other music people or whatever. There was tons of industry people. It was this LA Green Day show, and everyone was “okay, we’re at the back, we’re near the bar” and I was like “I’m watching this show in the pit, I was so sweaty and these people were moshing all over me…”

Back when they were playing like American Idiot when I was a little kid, my mom was like, “you’re not going to a Green Day concert. Zero chance.” so it was really sick for me.”

You touched on imposter syndrome. How did it feel to go from singing in your basement and doing all of that to an artist who is getting on Green Day’s guest list?

“It’s been it’s very weird. Often I have to pause and be like, is this my life? It’s very confusing and I do shows and people are screaming my songs and I’m like, really? I used to call my producer or he toured with me on my first tour ever. People are screaming the words to my songs. I asked him “Why do you think they like it?” and he was like, “what do you mean, why do you think they like it? It’s good.”

It’s very hard for me to wrap my head around just because the way I grew up, I’m the only person from high school that’s doing music. I don’t know anyone else doing anything like me. A lot of the times I come back home, I’m in Toronto now, and I get together with people and they’re telling me about their life and mine is so different.

I really did leave the Toronto bubble and just went to do my own thing. It’s weird. Sometimes it can be kind of isolating but then also at the same time, I love my life and I think it’s so cool and so fun. I’ve met so many people and new friends and stuff that musicians that relate to. But the whole thing is just weird. I don’t even know how to describe it.”

“I don’t know anyone else doing anything like me. A lot of the times I come back home, I’m in Toronto now, and I get together with people and they’re telling me about their life and mine is so different…”

Getting out of that Toronto bubble. How did your life change?

“I feel like friends definitely changed or rather the relationships I have with friends changed. I used to have a lot more time. I don’t have as much time and so I feel like my friends back home had to kind of accept things like I’m not gonna call you every day but when I come back, let’s hang kind of thing. It made relationships hard for sure always being out on the road or you know moving cities, long distance relationships are very hard. So yeah, it definitely ruined some relationships for me. It’s weird.

I feel like, as a musician, the thing you’re most in love with is music so sometimes that could be hard for other people to understand when it’s like, and I almost feel bad because I feel like I love my job more than my boyfriend right now, or my ex-boyfriend now. That’s weird, but it’s different for musicians.”

It’s not a 9 to 5 job, is it? You always live in the now…

“Yeah, it’s so weird. It’s like this whole different thing so I found myself now just recently being surrounded by musicians. Now I’m in a relationship with a musician. My best friends are musicians so that a whole other thing now. Now I’m surrounded by people where everyone is living a crazy life and that’s a whole other thing that can sometimes be very chaotic. Both sides are kind of interesting. I don’t even know how to explain this. This is a very interesting topic we’re talking about.”

Did those relationships change when you went back to Toronto as a successful musician?

“Yes and no, it depends. I have my really best friends where I don’t think anything will ever change but then I have some other friends. I remember I came back one Summer and I was at this get together and everyone was like talking like “oh I hate my job and this and nine to five and whatever” and I just had nothing to say. I feel like I don’t relate to these people that I like grew up with for years. Now I almost don’t have anything to talk about anymore and it was kind of sad.”

What prompted the move to LA?

“Well, I’m back and forth so I got my Visa and everything, but I kind of go month to month sometimes there because I’m on tour so much. So it’s hard to just like commit. I don’t have my own place. I’m just like at my parents in Toronto and then when I’m in LA, me and my roommate, Gus, who’s also an artist, who’s amazing, we kind of just like go for months at a time at kind of like an Airbnb style place, but it also is an apartment so that’s cheaper than Airbnb.

What prompted it was I got signed to APG Publishing. They discovered me on Tik Tok. I got signed first as a songwriter and then they said, “you have to come to LA. Come for songwriting sessions.” So I did that. I did my rounds. I had so many sessions pitching for all these different artists in the room then, at the time, maybe it was COVID, there was no touring going on and I didn’t know if touring would ever come back. I had never gone on tour before at the time so I thought maybe I’ll just be a songwriter. I really love writing songs. For a second, I was debating not even being an artist anymore and just being a songwriter because it seemed easier.

Then when things started to clear up COVID wise, I got offered my first tour ever. I went on that tour and I had the best time of my life. What the fuck was I thinking? I couldn’t be just a songwriter, I love performing.”

What was it like going from being a songwriter to having your own songs out there? You write from quite a personal perspective. How does it feel seeing millions of fans singing your songs, screaming your lyrics back at you?

“It’s unlike anything else. I would say it’s probably the best feeling ever, like literally ever. I can’t even describe it. It’s just the best feeling better than anything else ever. It’s that high that you get from that is almost dangerous because you’re just constantly chasing to feel that feeling again and nothing beats it. Literally nothing beats it.”

Considering you write from a personal perspective, it must be quite really rewarding that fans can relate to what you’re writing about?

“It’s very rewarding. It’s surprising. I remember at one point I was thinking, “Damn, these songs are getting a little specific and very personal. I hope I’m not isolating anyone.” After I did that for the song that I was really scared about that, I got so many messages and DMs and people coming up to me after the show telling me “You wrote that song about my ex.” Err… did you date my ex? Do we date, do we have the same ex boyfriend? What the hell? It’s so crazy that we all have this shared experience, even though it’s so specific, so many people relate and it reminds them of this person that did this, it’s just so crazy.”

Lyrically, you’ve talked about certain songs tying the whole theme of the record together. Could you tell us a bit about the theme of the record?

“The theme really is in the title falling for robots and wishing I was one. It basically is like the two sides of the coin of falling for people that seem heartless and unemotional and numb and just wondering how the hell do you live like that but then at the same time being jealous that they are like that and wishing that I could have a little bit of that in me. I feel like opposites attract. I’m so over emotional and over sensitive and constantly overthinking. I can be the most confident person one day and the most insecure person the next second, feelings all over the place.

I wish for a second I could turn it but, at the same time, the album is also about what it means to be human and recognizing that, even with the bad feelings of being human, at least I am human, I’d rather be that and be alive, I guess.”

What did you get out of writing the record?

“I definitely got free therapy. It definitely was very therapeutic and it felt like a purge of all of these feelings. I feel like I learned a lot about myself while doing it and got to explore different styles and stuff but mainly I just let a lot out for sure.”

LØLØ ‘Falling For Robots and Wishing I Was One’ Album Artwork

A lot of people don’t have that outlet to get it out. What advice would you give someone that doesn’t?

“I guess just listen to my songs is the same thing as therapy just feel free to scream them, cry to them. I’m definitely a big believer in trying to find an outlet and I think for a lot of people the outlet is listening to music. For me personally, it’s writing music and listening to music.

I like to go on long walks. I feel like just being outside in general, getting some fresh air is a really good outlet. I would highly suggest that. Working out, highly suggest that. Not being a blob… even though I’ve been a blob this week so can’t say I always practice what I preach, but I try.”

In terms of music being an outlet, is there one album you go to? We’ve talked about American Idiot for example…

“Recently, in the last year, year and a half, I would say the record by Boy Genius is a big one for me. I love that record. It’s definitely one I would put on front to back. It’s hard though. I don’t play a lot of albums anymore or newer ones. It’s like I feel like when I was growing up and there was CDs and you would just put the CD on but then, very quickly, I Wasn’t really in the CD era that much, it very quickly became a iPod playlist then you could just shuffle it or I think at first it just shuffled. That was the ipod shuffle. I don’t really listen to that many new albums front to back but I would say Boy Genius would be the most recent one.”

You’ve toured with a lot of artists from Simple Plan at the beginning, you’ve also gone out and toured with bands like New Found Glory, Boys like Girls, Against The Current. What have you learned from working with those artists?

“I feel like every tour I learned so much and I’m constantly watching the sets and seeing what did they do? What are the fans like when they do this or what happens when they do that? I would honestly give credit to New Found Glory for starting my career. They found me on a Spotify playlist, Chad in particular, I always shout him out in interviews because he found me, believed in me, added me to that tour. It was my first tour ever.

I almost didn’t even do it. He convinced me to do it. He taught me literally everything I know about touring and was so, so kind to me. Honestly, I’ve been so lucky with the bands that I’ve opened for. Everyone’s been so nice, so kind, so supportive, so helpful with teaching me things and I hope that I could do that for someone one day.”

Just to wrap up then. Going right back to the start, if you were to speak to the tap dancing, acting kid back then, what advice would you give yourself?

“I would probably just give myself the advice to just keep going through any rejection, any feeling like shit or feeling like you’re not good enough because I definitely felt that a lot. I feel like this industry is so hard. There are so many no’s. I read this thing once that, it was actually about acting but I think it pertains to all of the arts, it said that acting was just for the criminally insane, just for people that are so out of their minds because they are told no so many times, they still keep going. Whereas a normal person, after being told no, would be think it’s time to try something new. In the arts it’s just like there’s so many no’s, there’s so much rejection, there’s so much hate but somehow we’re still going. That’s the only answer.

So, I guess I would just tell her to keep going because life’s gonna get great. You’re gonna perform “Just A Kid” with Simple Plan. You’re gonna meet Green Day and they’re gonna say that they like your music and uh, shit’s gonna go good…”