Nikki & Jon Stipp on Hooked Like Helen, Trauma, Sobriety, Mental Health & Healing with Music // #074

heartdea13r Podcast w/ chr1stoph3r g0nda // Episode 74 // Nikki & Jon Stipp (Hooked Like Helen)

Episode Summary:

Nikki & Jon Stipp comprise the husband-and-wife musical duo, Hooked Like Helen. The conversation with this inspiring couple explores sobriety, family, personal growth, and, of course, music. Nikki and Jon share their journeys of overcoming trauma, embracing sobriety, and using their music to inspire and heal others.

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Full Episode Transcript:

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (00:23.992)
you know, want to talk about your music and the meaning behind the music and sobriety and being a husband and wife duo, but you just said that your son’s coming home, so your parents as well.

Hooked Like Helen (00:34.428)
We are parents, Oh, and we love that. And we love that. Yes. It is. It is, for sure.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (00:36.11)
See? You what?

I mean, it’s probably the best part of all of it.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (00:47.82)
You just have the one.

Hooked Like Helen (00:49.594)
We just have one. He’s 12. He’s about to be 13. So he’s going to be a teenager next month, which is crazy. Yeah, it’s wild. So fast.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (00:59.518)
I, my God, the cliches are also true. You you feel like, yeah, yeah, mom, dad, shut up, I don’t care. And then you get to be a parent and you’re like, man, they do grow up fast and time does move faster. And you’re like, my, maybe they were right.

Hooked Like Helen (01:14.18)
Yeah. know, like thinking about like how many years are left until he’s an adult is just like that’s going to go by in a blink of an eye. I don’t know what happened. So weird.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (01:24.302)
I remember reading an article when I first started to get like into more long form articles before the pandemic. So 2018, 2019, this one got fed to me. I used to save them in this app called Pocket. And then I would like read them offline on the way to work, whether I was on the subway or the bus or whatever, I would just go through. It would strip out the text. And this one was called 18 summers. And there was this guy talked about how

If you distill it down as a parent, you have 18 summers, that’s it. And it was just a mind blowing concept that the time with the child is so limited because then they leave the nest, proverbial nest, and then they go live their lives and you’re not guaranteed that anymore.

Hooked Like Helen (01:58.0)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (02:09.263)
Yeah, yeah, it’s wild and we’re already we’re already at like the 13th summer. Yeah Yeah, yeah, no he’s we’re real proud of him though he’s he’s a good boy he’s walking in right now We’re gonna try not to let him know we’re talking about him because he’s at that age. Yeah Yes, yes that age it’s a interesting time

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (02:15.734)
Yeah, five to go.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (02:34.274)
Yeah, I love ones and threes. You said he’s 13. If I’m not mistaken, Nikki, you’re 13 years sober, roughly.

Hooked Like Helen (02:42.288)
Yes, yep. boom. August 12th is my sobriety date, so thank you. Thank you.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (02:47.79)
Congrats.

So how much of this sobriety has to do with your son and becoming a mother?

Hooked Like Helen (02:57.756)
100 % all of it. August 12th was the day that I discovered that I was pregnant. So it was complete, you know, cold turkey right from that moment. And obviously it’s a process as far as, you know.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (03:04.397)
Wow.

Hooked Like Helen (03:14.81)
the healing that kind of has to happen once the actual substance is gone. But that was the starting point for me. And that’s my whole entire motivation. I had a lot of self-loathing going on and self-worth issues caused by trauma. And so for me, I didn’t have it in me to get sober for myself. But once it became about another person and an innocent life, it completely changed things.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (03:21.677)
and

Hooked Like Helen (03:44.716)
for me so I feel very lucky I know that’s not that’s not the path for everybody but for me that that was a switch for sure that shouldn’t be everybody’s way to get sober don’t just yeah I don’t recommend it don’t just go get pregnant like it’s not it’s not always you know a happy happy ending or whatever but that that was the beginning a happy beginning

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (03:52.056)
I’ll see.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (04:05.997)
Good for you. I I think you said something important there that, you know, while sometimes problems can seem universal, the solutions aren’t necessarily right. Like there’s so many different paths that one can take to healing. It doesn’t even have to be therapy. It could be through church. It could be through conversation with friends. It could be something else, but you can find a path to a better life. You just have to be open to it and see what works for you.

I want to unpack it more, before we do, like, how’d you guys meet? How did this whole crazy family business slash artistry fuse and happen? Cleveland dating scene.

Hooked Like Helen (04:49.147)
Yeah, not quite, but… It was actually out in LA that we met. That’s she’s from originally. I grew up just north of Los Angeles in SoCal and…

He grew up here in the Cleveland area of Ohio, but he moved out to LA when a friend of his also moved out a drummer and they joined a band out there. And then the band found a YouTube video of me and asked me to join on Keys. So I joined the band and it was called Red Circle Underground. And it was kind of just like a seven piece kind of almost like a jam rock, classic rock kind of a thing. And that was how John and I met. So like we knew each other and worked together as

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (05:25.485)
Okay.

Hooked Like Helen (05:31.665)
bandmates and musicians like you know well before. a couple years. Yeah we like actually started dating or anything so like we know how to be bandmates like first.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (05:40.779)
Yeah. Was it a classic tale of like, friends first, and then you fell into love sort of, or.

Hooked Like Helen (05:47.142)
Kinda. Honestly, mean, I haven’t really put it that way, but yeah, I mean, like I said, we played together for about two years. And then, I don’t know, out of nowhere. Just kind of developed. went on tour. We

snuggling. We were the two youngest people in the band and the two hardest partiers. So we were up late, everybody else passed out and we were just like hanging out and just getting to know each other on like you know a deeper level. I made it sound so innocent. You’re like yeah we were the ones up late still drunk.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (06:18.925)
You

Hooked Like Helen (06:22.149)
But yeah, that’s true too. Yeah, so that’s how we met. then, you know, things at first, honestly, we were kind of bad for each other. In a lot of ways, we kind of helped each other get to that rock bottom faster. And a lot of people were kind of skeptical of like, my gosh, this is turning into like a whole like.

hurricane of hot mess and you know then when we found out that I was pregnant it was like Okay, we gotta we need to make some changes and I have to like hand it to John because he was like Okay, we’re gonna I’m gonna leave

my whole environment, which is super negative and super like full of drugs and alcohol so that I can come move in with my sober pregnant girlfriend. And then we can figure out a plan. And the plan was to move to Ohio where him and his family were from to kind of like go work for the family business and kind of just like do the straight and narrow thing and, you know, provide a better environment for our son to grow up in. She makes it me sound too good, though, because I was to a point and I knew it.

I was still with it enough to know this. I was to a point where I needed a change of environment anyway. Because I knew that I was getting too deep into a bunch of shit that I shouldn’t be getting into. And then when we got pregnant, it was like, OK, time to go, time to change. So yeah. And we’re thankful for it. True.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (07:48.95)
Yeah, I’m so happy for you guys. That’s such a lovely story. And I think that the irony is that change happens by choice or force. And 99 % of time, it’s forced. And then once we’ve been forced to change, it becomes much easier to choose change. Personally, was born with a heart condition. And thankfully, when I was three, had open heart surgery. And I’ve had like,

Hooked Like Helen (08:00.528)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (08:06.107)
Mm-hmm.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (08:15.617)
very strong ticker ever since. I’ve had COVID a couple times and it wasn’t until like the second or third strain that impacted my heart and I had like physical ailments because of it, but.

I was also drinking and partying and not taking care of myself the way I needed to. So for me, getting COVID and having all of a sudden all these scares was what I needed to stop drinking excessively. I still drink sometimes, but I learned how to control it through, I shouldn’t say control it. I have a proper relationship with it now because of how much therapy I had to do because drinking was a coping mechanism for other stuff, which I didn’t even realize that I was dealing with.

until a couple years ago my ex and I split and that for me was the

The next big moment in my life where I said, what is going on here? This is the second time a relationship has fallen apart or I’m going through a divorce. I’m the common denominator. Head first into all things therapy and learning about myself. And now it’s like I’m actively pursuing change as if it was the drug because it’s so nice to feel lighter and healthier and better.

Hooked Like Helen (09:34.075)
Yes, that’s amazing. Wow. my gosh. You say you were three years old and you had open heart surgery?

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (09:38.839)
But some

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (09:42.51)
Yeah, I was three when I had the surgery. It was nothing crazy. I was born with like a congenital heart defect, which now is, I think they can actually fix it in the womb now or to the point where like they fixed it on day one. It’s pretty crazy. But like the point is simply that similar to you guys that you have to kind of hit those, those markers sometimes in order to like really progress forward. And, you know, John, I’m really like impressed. Not everyone is.

enjoying a rock and roll lifestyle and with a beautiful woman and you’re like, my God, pregnancy, I’m going to choose that.

Hooked Like Helen (10:16.899)
Yeah, but like I said, I kind of was just trying to remember where I’m from and the morals that I do have just as a person. And the shape I was in, I never thought I would do some of the things that I was doing just substance-wise. It was a very toxic work environment with a bunch of people who I loved dearly. And you say you’re a fan of Anthony Bourdain, which is great, because I worked in the back of a kitchen.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (10:34.701)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (10:46.669)
in Hermosa Beach, California, and had who I looked at as brothers for a year. You know what I mean? We were just a team and crew. were so close. And then out of nowhere, you just find yourself doing drugs that you normally thought that you would never find yourself doing. It just became normal out of nowhere. So I just knew that I didn’t want that to be my story. And I knew the next chapter.

after that, if I didn’t get it together, was probably going to be the ugly one. I was way out of control and not healthy and not where you want to be already, but the next step would have been straight up just addict, I guess. Not functional. Not functional.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (11:21.335)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (11:39.502)
I held a job. I was functional. I was in a band and I was doing all these things, but you know, I knew that that had to stop. It was coming to an end and there was a fork in the road. Yeah, yeah. And it was like, okay, are we going to die or are we going to live? Yeah, yeah. So, you know, our son really did it for me too, honestly. I mean, she was someone carrying him and physically had to stop, you know.

the substances. But I guess now that we’re talking about it, I mean that that was what helped me choose the right way to go at that fork.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (12:07.681)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (12:17.899)
Yeah, that’s beautiful. mean, so it sounds like in many ways, your son saved both of your lives and brought you closer together.

Hooked Like Helen (12:28.003)
100%. Yeah, I mean, you know, he’s he’s almost 13 now. So we’ve kind of told him little bits and pieces about our history, like as he’s grown. I mean, because he comes to our shows and we talk about sobriety and stuff, you know, because our music is very much, you know, in line with that with the messaging and our fans and everything. So, you know, we kind of had to like make sure that that he was kind of aware of things. And and, you know, we got to the point where it was like, you know, Aghi, like you saved my life. You know what I mean?

before you were born, saved my life. And you know, he just had like this really big smile. And it was like, it was really cute, you know, but we try to strike that balance with him too, of like, there is a way to have a healthy relationship with alcohol, you know, but you just need to be aware that like a lot of times, you know, sometimes it can be like a genetic predisposition and things like that. So like, you just have to always be checking in with yourself, you know. And obviously he’s not there yet, but he knows that there will come a time when

And there will be alcohol and there will be people doing it and it’ll be okay, and he just needs to figure out where he’s at with it.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (13:36.705)
Yeah, which is also such an interesting concept, right? Like being a parent, have to, I believe we should strike this balance of what’s the metaphor, watch them on the playground, know that they’re gonna get hurt, let them get hurt, but make sure they don’t die, right? It’s like.

Hooked Like Helen (13:55.772)
Perfect. Mistakes are so high. That hits me so hard. Yes, correct. 100%.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (14:03.821)
So he’s, they’re going to make a lot of mistakes and that’s okay because that’s literally how we learn, right? To err and whatnot. So just make sure that they don’t die. John, you mentioned like that’s not how you grew up and your morals and whatnot. Like what was your childhood? What is your morality, so to speak?

Hooked Like Helen (14:16.26)
my gosh.

Hooked Like Helen (14:27.306)
Just small town. I grew up in a church, I guess. I’m not really religious or anything like that, but technically I was in Sunday school, you know what I mean? you just grow up in a tight-knit community in kind of the area where you know everybody. And there’s just certain things that you don’t do, you know what I mean? You don’t hurt people, don’t do drugs, you don’t steal, you don’t…

you know, I don’t want to get into the terrible things that you obviously don’t do, but like, there’s just certain things like that, that you don’t do. you, you know, we used to drink and smoke pot and all that, like in high school, but like, you know, I would never think that we would do like hard drugs, you know what I mean? Not here, but then you end up getting to a place where you did, you know? So like at one point in my life, there was, you know, just some drugs that I was like, there’s no way that I would ever.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (15:17.218)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (15:25.307)
You know what mean? And then fast forward, all of a sudden I’m in the kitchen and it’s like, okay, I’ve had like 13 beers and if I don’t get some more, I’m not gonna be able to continue my shift. and then you just realize, I guess, that it’s like, okay, oh my God, now my girlfriend is pregnant, if you even wanna call us that.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (15:37.216)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (15:49.734)
dating for like a minute or whatever. We knew each other for two years and we’re friends and everything but like girlfriend not for long. And I don’t know I lose my train of thought probably from all the drugs I used to do but yeah you just you got to just remember I did you know like I had thought that I’d never thought that I would be in this position what’s happening.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (16:15.148)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (16:16.549)
living human child inside of this girl now. It’s time to stop fucking around, get away from these people who you love. Like I said, they were my friends. it’s a judgment on them. They are going through their own shit, but it’s just that whole peer pressure, like, this is normal here. We’re gonna just be. And I had tried to stop doing things, but then you get around it, you get to work and you’re surrounded by it and stuff like that. And it’s like, it was impossible for me. So I had to just straight up leave.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (16:32.417)
Yep.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (16:45.068)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (16:48.783)
make that decision.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (16:49.325)
I mean, is hard and there’s oftentimes so many like repercussions and fallouts that happen when you make a choice like that. And it’s not just boost. The people have issues with so many different things. Workahol, like I had a lot of issues and my issue that came out in my last marriage was infidelity. And unfortunately, like I made a lot of poor decisions, decisions like you just said, John, that

I never thought in a million years that I’d be that person who’s doing those things. And then eventually one day you wake up and you’re like, man, I did do that. But I think it’s important to have that conversation with yourself, right? Be honest with yourself. And what does Shakespeare say to that? I don’t self be true. Nothing else matters in those moments, right? Like if you’re going to walk away from all your friends, from your job, from your career, but it means saving you and you forging ahead as a better person that is.

better for the world, impacts positive change, then that’s probably a good decision.

Hooked Like Helen (17:51.855)
Yeah, yeah. I left, I left work. Everyone was like, what the hell? Where’d you go? What happened to John? And at one point I called him a couple weeks later and I’m like, hey man, I just had to go. I needed a lifestyle change and he mailed me my last paycheck up to where we were staying and he was all cool about it, totally understood.

wasn’t even a big deal. I made it such a big deal in my head, like they’re gonna be so, so worried and so messed up over this and I’m letting them down and all this stuff. But then I just was straight up with him and told him exactly what it was. And they were really, really cool. Mail me a check, wish me the best and that is what it is. And it was the best decision, even though was hard. and it was hard and I didn’t get, I got,

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (18:39.074)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (18:44.347)
I got almost sober. guess there were a couple times where I drank up there, but I never did any like hard drugs once I left this certain area.

and have a to stay clean since.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (18:59.191)
The good for you. I mean, I was just gonna say that the clean break is sometimes out of survival, right? Because if you don’t do that, you don’t just piece out from that environment and work or whatever it is, then there’s a chance that you’ll just be pulled back in, right? Like, you know, like it’s been a couple of weeks, I miss these guys, let’s go for a drink. And before you know it, you’re just back into that routine.

Hooked Like Helen (19:21.903)
Yeah, that’s exactly what was going on. That’s exactly it. And I just knew that I needed to get out of there. And it was hard to cut all those ties. And like I said, all these guys, I still talk to some of them. I love them. There’s no judgment. Even though we’re a sober band, like this is kind of off of what we’re saying, but like we don’t cast judgment. We’re not like.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (19:30.892)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (19:41.915)
We’re not like a straight edge. I don’t know if that’s still the punk rock term or whatever, if you crack a beer at a hook like Helen’s show, you’re shunned. That’s not it. We want people to feel like they can come and have a good time at our show no matter where they are with substances and drinking.

drink or not. But we just want anyone who is struggling to know that there is a way out and we’re there to like support that. And look at us we’re still rock and roll. We’re still on stage having fun, head banging at the party, like having a good time, not missing out, like feeling good, having a great time. You know and it took a while to get there. That doesn’t happen overnight.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (20:18.05)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (20:23.125)
I love that. So was chatting with a drummer last year and my God, why am I spacing out his name right now? It’s gonna come to me. Frank Zummo, geez, I don’t know why I forgot his name. Frank’s done a ton of stuff and he’s also a very inspiring man. He also is big into mindset and lifestyle and positivity. And when we were chatting, I came up with the concept of rock star.

being simply that in order to shine the brightest to be a star, you have to have a rock solid base. A rock star traditionally sex, drugs, rock and roll, everything’s chaos, then there’s a crash. That’s the opposite of what takes to be a rock star. It takes a strong foundation. It takes a very strong mind. And so I guess, you we can come back to the messaging within your music, but

What are your minds like? What’s the drive like? It takes a lot to wake up and choose to be sober, to be a parent, to be in a family, but also to be a husband and wife creative duo and like do music for life. So do you guys do it because you absolutely have to because you’re stubborn? Why are you hooked like Helen?

Hooked Like Helen (21:41.849)
All of the above, but I’ll let you answer that. All of the above. I’ve been a musician my whole entire life. writing songs has just been what I’ve done since I was little. Part of my own self-expression and just like, you know.

contributing something to the world. But I really love what you just said about having the strong base because I did not have that for a very long time because of my past and my childhood and just being kind of broken. So I was always creating music and music was always the thing inside of me that I wanted to be doing, but I really didn’t have the tools and the…

self-esteem honestly to like truly pursue things the way pursue my vision the way that I needed to until I started the healing journey and it’s like you know I tell people you know I got sober on August 12 2012 but I didn’t I didn’t really start

That was the stopping of the process of actively dying was that day, but I didn’t start to live until honestly the 2020 pandemic when I had like.

moment of stillness and like stopping and being like, holy shit, there’s a bunch of stuff that I need to process. that like unraveling of that stuff coincided with building a way stronger foundation of like, okay, this is what we need to do. This is how we need to attack this. This is the sound. This is the vision. This is you know what I mean? So like we were always doing music the whole time. We were in bands, we were in projects, we were writing, you know, for film and TV, whatever, but like hook like

Hooked Like Helen (23:23.248)
Helen really kind of like took on like a new form, I guess, like around the 2020 time period and like continues to get stronger like as I continue the healing process. Because obviously it’s not just like, I’m healed now, you know, it’s just sort of like a, I’m unraveling this, I’m working on that, I’m processing this and like just building self-esteem, building self-worth. And as you healed and self-esteem, she says, like she…

You were much more talented than she led on. Like once she started getting confidence in herself, the things that she was doing and pulling off both musically and just, like to be an independent band, you have to really kind of learn how to do everything. You know, have to learn how to be a graphic designer. have to learn how to be a recording engineer. that, this, that, and this. You have to do everything. And she’s been able to like pretty much master most things. Wow.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (24:18.23)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (24:18.85)
of many trades, you know.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (24:21.793)
Well, I think that I think you’re absolutely right. mean, it’s like being an entrepreneur. Anything you do independently requires a lot of work. And the more you put into it, the more you understand, I think the better overall chances you have of success. It doesn’t mean that there isn’t value in working with a team and expanding and, you know, doling out work to other people. But that’s only as possible as you have time and money and.

things available to you. So yeah, you got to take on wear as many hats as possible, you know, you, you said something there that actually I was going to bring up later, but this idea of you being even more talented that you let on to believe. think that oftentimes when we strip things away, we see the talent more. I’m not a fan of Lady Gaga at all.

However, when I saw the acoustic piano version she did of her own song, I was blown away. And that same moment happened for me with your music, Goosebumps and all, when I put on, I didn’t even put it on, it just came up, the cover of Slipknot’s Duality. I was like, whoa, what is going on here? This woman can sing, not that you couldn’t before, but like for some reason.

Hooked Like Helen (25:33.045)
wow.

Hooked Like Helen (25:40.095)
yeah. Thank you.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (25:43.371)
That cover was raw and subtle and showed so much strength in you guys, as musicians, as singers, as a team. Talk to me about that. What do you think?

Hooked Like Helen (25:54.873)
my gosh, well thank you. Yeah, appreciate that compliment. I really love that compliment because that song, that whole like thing just it took so many weird twists and turns and there were like you said team we we are lucky that we have you know different people and have had different people kind of come in and be helpful in certain ways. The first like there were different iterations of our cover of that song and they just were not doing what I needed them to do. So despite needing

to like kind of hurt some people’s feelings or whatever we we ended up collaborating with Shawn Michael Rooney on the on the string.

orchestration there. kind of like completely redid an arrangement of song. And I like was just getting over COVID and like had to sing the song. And like, so I had to sing it so many times and just we record vocals downstairs in our home studio, you know, so just down there. My mom was visiting. She’s upstairs. like, how many takes is she going to, you know what I mean? Because I just like needed to like get, know, so it was just like so much went into that. Yeah. So that like that emotion you’re hearing is real. She’s just get out here.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (26:57.037)
you

Hooked Like Helen (27:02.748)
Yeah, because you know we love the song super big fans of the band and the song and everything and we had already been playing it on tour like to kind of close out some of our sets because it’s just such a great sing-along song you know. people. But we just kind of it just was a it was a hell of a process to get it to where it was so I appreciate that somebody appreciated it. we were just gonna say we were thinking about maybe rehashing a just a string version of that.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (27:13.378)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (27:19.095)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (27:22.869)
Absolutely. that’s not… Sorry, John, go ahead.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (27:35.575)
Ta-da!

Hooked Like Helen (27:36.666)
No,

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (27:41.742)
Yeah, I mean, please, by no means does that detract from the quality of all of your other work. It was just for some reason when that song came on, it caught me off guard. I thought that maybe there was like the wrong band in the playlist of your music, but it was just so raw. And with that tune in specific, you can just hear like the talent oozing through the speakers. It was fantastic.

Hooked Like Helen (28:06.2)
That makes me so happy that we did it. So thank you, seriously. That’s a great compliment and we appreciate that. I understand what you’re saying and thank you for saying that it doesn’t take away from the other stuff.

everybody, everything grabs people differently. And if that’s the one that got you in, then great. Well, and it’s amazing. It’s such an iconic song. So like there, you know, there could always be a lot of backlash or hate. And we actually haven’t had any really, honestly, not not a significant amount on that, you know, from like the diehards. So that’s always that’s a good seal of approval. When we play it, we we tend to head bang very hard. So even the raucous rocker.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (28:34.689)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (28:49.39)
Yes. Accepts it. Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (28:52.501)
You said something cool there that kind of ties nicely into continuing the conversation about the sobriety is that music is, especially the lyrics is very subjective, right? You you hear something and you might hear the lyrics differently from the other person. The meaning is different from you. You put this message into your music that stems from sobriety. However, it seems to be done in a way that is abstract where it’s not

First of all, it’s not pre-G. And secondly, it’s focused on alcohol. It feels like it’s more like just general mental fortitude, mental wellness overall. Do you think that’s accurate?

Hooked Like Helen (29:36.539)
Yes, and sorry, go ahead. I’m talking way more than I usually do. But once again, thank you. That’s good to hear. We love that. Honestly, like in this day and age of social media and algorithms and AI trying to put you in a category and niche this and niche that, sometimes it works against us that we’re not just slamming it right in your face that we’re talking about this.

But as an artist and in my heart and my soul, that’s, and like the artists that I love, that I grew up with.

it needs to be open to interpretation. There needs to be a little bit of like empty space for someone to fill with their own heart and their own soul when they listen. So, you know, like Sleepwalker, that’s our song about sobriety, right? But really what it’s about is about loving someone who doesn’t love themselves. And so there can be a wide range of like how that gets interpreted. And I feel like, you know, it’s been really a beautiful thing for us and honestly part of my healing to connect.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (30:29.826)
Right.

Hooked Like Helen (30:41.164)
with fans who, you know, resonate with that song. Some of them are people who are freshly sober. Some of them are people who are not sober, but they want to be sober. Some of them are at odds with a parent because their parent is an addict and they had to do a no contact. Some of them, a best friend or a loved one just died. You know, they’re…

There’s so many different ways to interpret that because you want to leave it open. But then at the end of the day, we also really try to have some element of hope pretty much in any of our songs. Just because it’s like…

I as a, just as a person, know, like if I die tomorrow, it’s like what I’ve left on this planet, I want it to be something like good or something that do some good. So it’s like, you know, the music, there’s all kinds of music for all kinds of different things. So it’s not bashing on stuff. So that is just 100 % depressing. We need depressing music too. You know what I mean? But for me, it’s just like, there’s always gotta be that little bit of like, okay, I really don’t feel good, but I know that I will, or I know that I could, you know?

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (31:25.708)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (31:38.923)
Definitely.

Hooked Like Helen (31:48.389)
Yeah, and sorry, it’s just, it’s, we don’t, it’s like when you listen to Sleepwalker, it doesn’t have to be about alcohol. Like not being pigeonholed, is that a wrong thing to say? Pigeonholed as is that okay to say? I think so. That just sings about one thing. I love that even though that is kind of our platform because we wanna play to everybody.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (31:48.748)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (32:17.036)
No.

Hooked Like Helen (32:17.146)
I don’t care about your politics. don’t care if you, you know, I hope you don’t have anybody struggling with alcohol, but if you do, you’re coming to our show and that’s wonderful. We’ll try and help you. But if you don’t have any interest in that or you don’t need help in that area, we still want to bring you in because we can help with anything. We try and create a family, you know, and like race, background.

Gay, straight, like, we really don’t care. We’re all people and we all need some sort of help sometimes. connection. With something. connection. Correct.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (32:47.02)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (32:52.427)
Yeah. Yeah. I’m right there with you. talk about this often on this podcast where I’m 45 and I grew up in a world where, you know, people did talk about politics. People did talk about religion. There were also, you there was also that expression where it’s like a dinner party. You just, you talk about everything except for politics and religion, but people judge you based on your character, not like who you voted for or what you believed in.

Hooked Like Helen (33:17.55)
right.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (33:17.751)
We’ve lost that. don’t know if it’s been intentional or by accident or both, but that’s what we need to come back to. the, is no black and white. I mean, there is, but everything is great. You you talked about boxing and defining and sure there are things that work for a general solution, but.

It’s not always the case and the individual has to ask themselves that because you sometimes you could have a problem with alcohol but alcohol is not the problem it’s a symptom of something deeper right it so you have to do the work to go inward to ask yourself what is this and so I like your idea of having general messaging because it could apply to someone with alcohol or drugs maybe it’s someone who like grew up with abuse I don’t know the point is talk to yourself talk to others

Hooked Like Helen (34:03.32)
Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (34:06.529)
Yeah. Healing is the best. Music helps heal. And I think that when you have music with a message, that the chances of healing are a little higher.

Hooked Like Helen (34:19.748)
Yes, I totally agree. Thank you. It is. Yeah, I mean, know like when I was younger and I was a little girl that was going through all kinds of abuse and I was totally alone and traumatized. mean, like my one comfort was music. It was my records. It was my favorite artist. And it was just going and like creating a universe for myself where I was somebody else or I was somewhere else or I was safe, you know, and then that extended to, OK, now I’m going to like.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (34:25.367)
So.

Hooked Like Helen (34:48.574)
I’m gonna make my own music cuz I wanna create that feeling for other people or whatever. And it’s just, there’s nothing else in the world that has ever been able to match that for me. It’s like music is it.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (35:01.815)
Yeah. So that’s super fascinating. So music was your escape and your safe space. So you started to create your own universe there. And then at some point you said, I want to create this for other people. And then you started to do more inward healing and then realized not only is this a safe space, but now it’s a mechanism for me to be able to share the message with other people as well. Was that it?

Hooked Like Helen (35:24.058)
Absolutely. That’s what happened. That’s what happened. We’ve realized our purpose. And it’s because we have truly helped people. And we continue to. And we play for people all the time. And I tell this story all the time, so I’ll just bullet point it. But I mean, at the end of the night, man, there’s somebody that comes up to Nikki every time and thanks her for being vulnerable.

and is now thinking about dealing with whatever shit they need to be dealing with that they haven’t dealt with yet. They’re at least thinking about it. And that feels really good to prompt people to, you know, try and do something in their life that’s positive.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (36:04.247)
So with that said, I I’m just looking something up because I have a thought to talk about. Lend Me Your Ear and then the single that came out most recently, April 3rd, I Don’t Mind. It’s you can now that I’m hearing the story, you can see like the message there. I lend you let me your ear. Come and let me let me share with you some of the stuff that befell me. And maybe you can avoid those things.

I don’t mind was about the trauma, like what kind of trauma, Nikki? What was it that kind of precipitated the drinking? Do you want to share it all?

Hooked Like Helen (36:41.101)
Yeah, I mean, I really don’t go too deep into it. Most of time, I just kind of allude to it. But it was sexual abuse, like as a child. And then also like really bad emotional abuse from a parental figure who I don’t have contact with now. And it’s just, hard because I have a lot of siblings and a lot of families. So it’s like, don’t want to…

anyone uncomfortable who wasn’t a direct perpetrator of these things. But that’s kind of part of what I Don’t Mind is. It’s like in the second verse, it’s like you walk in the room, reopen wounds, you do it every time. Sometimes you can’t actually just get away from the person or thing that literally traumatized you or abused you or whatever. And you kind of have to just figure out how to coexist with that, especially as a child, especially when you’re not in charge of yourself.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (37:07.382)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (37:32.89)
So that’s like literally what the song is about is like, I can’t get better. So I’m just going to pretend that I am, you know, which causes all kinds of, you know, terrible like damage and after, after math, you know, and so, you know, the song’s like basically about dissociating from all of that stuff. And that was like kind of part of like, when I told you that, you know, 2020 was like sort of some revelations. was like realizing that like a lot of

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (37:39.383)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (38:02.843)
the things that happened to me were, were abuse and were not my fault because there was a lot of, let’s blame the kid. Let’s blame the one who told, let’s blame, you know, let’s blame the girl, whatever it was. And like, there was a lot of that that got internalized for me at the time and just.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (38:18.996)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (38:25.451)
like and and there were there were people in my life who I love who loved me who didn’t know better and they were reinforcing that message to me just by trying to keep the peace. So

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (38:38.039)
Mm-hmm.

Hooked Like Helen (38:39.711)
It was kind of just being like, wait a minute, like this isn’t, this isn’t okay. I wouldn’t think that was okay if that happened to some other little girl. So why am I thinking it’s okay that it happened to me when I was a little girl? So like just being able to lift that blame and that shame off slowly, you know, over time and being able to like call it what it was and build the self worth, you know, it was everything.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (39:05.666)
Yep.

I really appreciate you sharing and you know both of you have done similar things in that you were honest with yourself and then you were honest with other people. I really believe that you know the expression the truth shall set you free. When you are just honest, when you just own something especially if it’s something you did, it’s so important for the healing process. It also takes everyone else’s power away.

I’ve had a lot of guests on recently that have been in around or they’re working around mental health. Jane Astor-Roe, I think I chatted with her like last week. She has a podcast coming out called The Defendants. It’s a six part mini series and it’s all about sexual assault. And it’s just so crazy how much

that is coming out now and being talked about more. I think that we as a people are starting to maybe find our voices better and to talk about these things. when we first started talking, I was kind of saying like, it’s so important for us to normalize these discussions. know, like it doesn’t have to be shame. It doesn’t have to be taboo. shouldn’t be, it is very difficult, but it shouldn’t have to be difficult because it’s just life.

Hooked Like Helen (40:17.337)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (40:25.549)
right.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (40:27.829)
And sometimes life sucks and you can’t have the great without the bad or the horrible. People talk about the good so openly.

why not the other? it sounds like so much of that is echoed in your shows and in the speaking engagements you do, where you’re trying to just say like, it’s cool, man, we’ve been there, we get it. Just talk about it and tell us about it because otherwise you’re going to carry that weight and that shame yourself. And the other person may or may not, if there was someone else in the equation, they might retain that power unnecessarily just because you’re allowing them.

Hooked Like Helen (41:00.921)
Exactly.

Yep, just, it’s, and like once it gets said, and I also have to thank John because he was so my support system during that time that I was unraveling this shit and he was just listening to me and he was just like validating me, you know, and just like, my gosh, yeah, no, that wasn’t your fault, you know, and like, and dealing with me being like on kind of like an emotional roller coaster, but getting it out and like saying it out loud, like, did, it just,

It just did so much. It just helped so much.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (41:35.468)
Yeah. Yeah, I actually, I might be butchering this, but this is what Jane said during that chat that someone said the most important thing, no matter what is to say it out loud. Whatever it is that happened to you, go and say it out loud and make it real. And that will start so many different processes, you know, to move along or moving along.

Hooked Like Helen (41:49.94)
Wow.

Hooked Like Helen (42:02.051)
Yeah, just to hear it, just to say it, different, hits different. Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (42:07.421)
100%. So we could probably talk about all the positivity and the messaging that you guys have with your music for days and the fact that you’re going to universities, including San Diego State and talking about these things. It sounds like this is a huge part of what you’re doing with your careers outside of just the music.

Tell me a bit about just your general mindset. what is it like in the day in the life of you guys? Do you wake up and you’re like, time to grind again, or we’ll take today off and tomorrow we’ll come back at it. What’s your mentality like when it comes to all things creation?

Hooked Like Helen (42:47.779)
We are continuously at the grind.

Yes, which I think in some way or another we are working every day, but we love it. So it’s, does not stop. Right. I mean, it’s our passion and our purpose. So it’s not the same thing as like, you know, we’re very thankful for because we’ve done a ton of clocking in. And so it’s not the same thing as clocking in, but it is a lot and there’s not a lot of rest. And I do think, you know, that’s two things. One, that’s just how it goes in this industry because someone’s going to be working harder than you. And then two,

I think, you know, once you’re an addict, like you’re kind of just going to always be addicted to something, you know, so I’m just you got to kind of pick your you got to pick your poison a little bit. So, you know, for us, maybe it’s workaholic a little bit, maybe it’s caffeine a little bit, maybe it’s working out, you know, our fitness journey. We try and get workouts in every day if we if we can, which is something that we like.

really emphasize when we do go to the universities and we talk because a lot of the students, like that’s one of the first questions is just like, what do you do to deal with anxiety? And just like on a basic, like just to lower your anxiety level in general, like over time.

fitness. It’s crazy. It’s insane how much it helps. Truly. It was like night and day for me. Like just going like I can’t keep living like this to just like. It would just be a half hour jog. Anything just to get moving. Break a little sweat over. Go do something that really, really takes the edge off immediately. And like she said, I guess our last vice that we have is caffeine. We do enjoy coffee. Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (44:16.417)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (44:28.067)
but we are, to answer the question, I mean, we just went on like a spring break with our son and we went and visited. We joined my mom and my brother and his wife in Vegas and then we did like a little road trip thing and I mean, I was.

We were not only working out in the gym at the hotel, but we also, was doing content we released, don’t mind. During that time period, it was every single day we did a podcast from the hotel. It was definitely work still every day because that’s the purpose is to just keep climbing.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (44:55.17)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (44:59.501)
Yeah, so you feel the same way that I do where you said it earlier, you found your purpose, you found the raison d’etre and you’re like, I can’t not do this, I have to do this, can’t stop, won’t stop. What about bringing in the marriage aspect? Because I’ve been in many relationships, it’s challenging and not in a bad way.

always. But like, what do you guys do to to check yourselves to reset yourselves to to continue to be able to work together professionally as well as having a happy home, happy marriage and family environment?

Hooked Like Helen (45:38.85)
It is a, it’s a difficult balance. I’ll say that we have our challenges. I think that there’s a little bit of a codependency, I think with us, I think we can admit that we’re very, we don’t live separate lives at all. That’s probably something that, you know, maybe is a healthy thing to do, but we are just, we’re, we’re so wrapped up with our son as parents, our household, our project, you know, that it’s just like, it, actually,

is probably like something that we, would say probably could use a little work on is figuring out how to separate, know, because it’s like we’re almost like the same person. We, yeah, we are kind of. And our moods affect each other. We try, we try and like have a date night or whatever like once every, you know, I don’t know, a couple months.

Well, we try and get out by ourselves and have dinner or whatever. But yeah, I we just got to just admit this. We wake up, we have coffee together, we usually are working out together. We kind of keep each other We’re rehearsing together. We’re answering almost like an accountability buddy almost. I don’t know.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (46:58.028)
Yeah.

each other’s clusters.

Hooked Like Helen (47:02.489)
Yeah, kind of, kind of in a way, whether that’s actually healthy or not, I’m not sure. yeah, really, even workouts. She pushes me in the workout. You should see her kickbox. You’re not going to stop.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (47:14.37)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (47:16.951)
Yeah, but at the same time, it’s like the highs that we’ve had, like the achievements, the goal hitting, the moments of like, whoa, like we’ve been able to experience them together in a way that like, honestly, you gotta kind of stop and appreciate that. Like, I’m not sure, you know, I mean, obviously every relationship is different, but like that’s kind of a unique and cool thing. Yeah, it’s amazing. Like we did our first stadium. We did KLAQ Rocks the Park in El Paso, Texas.

Phenomenal experience. my gosh and the city of El Paso is the most wonderful place, but We went out to this place. I can’t remember the name of it. You might

the next day and we had a Juarez dog because our buddy over at the radio station told us we had to have a Juarez dog. That’s like the local specialty. And some other like insanely good food like Mexican food they don’t mess around so good and and that was like a husband and wife thing that was separate from work but we were celebrating a win.

In the career. So it’s always career centered. Even if it is kind of a celebration, we’re still husband and wife.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (48:38.081)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (48:38.137)
I don’t know, you got me thinking a lot. But honestly, I can’t imagine having it any other way. I know other people can be partners in music or business or whatever and not be married. But I feel like it does give us an advantage to a certain degree because there’s a level of trust and a level of intimacy and a level of I have your back and all this stuff and loyalty that like…

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (48:49.773)
Mm-hmm.

Hooked Like Helen (49:00.897)
You know, that’s unwavering, you know, we have a child together. So we’re not going to just go do something. You like sign some contract or something behind each other’s back. Like, you know what I mean? We are like 100 percent entrenched together with everything that we do. So I feel like the music side strengthens us as parents in our unity and vice versa. So, yeah, therapist might tell me different. We have we have to keep going and we have to do good because we have it’s almost teenager in there who, you know,

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (49:03.585)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (49:14.775)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (49:30.841)
we have to do good for. Yeah. And of course.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (49:33.4)
Yeah. Well, I love that. And I by no means was implying that there’s, you know, a right or wrong way of doing things. I even think that because we’re human and we make mistakes and we’re not perfect. And you said it, Nikki, like life is this healing journey. It’s kind of like a fitness journey or a diet journey. It’s it’s it’s life law period.

It’s not something you can do a few reps and do a few sit ups and you’re good to go. It’s constant. And if you find something that works for you, let’s, let’s go back to sobriety for a second. If you find something that works for you, that puts you in a position that’s better than it was before, but it’s not ideal, at least it’s better.

Hooked Like Helen (50:14.84)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (50:15.243)
And what you’ll do then is you’ll learn more. You’ll figure out, okay, this is better, but it’s still not ideal. And then you’ll constantly add to that and ameliorate the situation until it is perfect for you. And for me, one of the aha moments that I had recently was with my girlfriend. We were talking about love and, my goodness, soulmates and things like that. And

I said, I’m not perfect, but this is who I am. And she stopped me. She said, you’re not perfect, but you’re perfect for me. And I think that that is such an important thing for people to remember is that there is no perfection and you will fuck up and you will relapse or whatever it is. Maybe not you will, but you could, you might.

Hooked Like Helen (50:53.017)
you

Hooked Like Helen (51:04.697)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (51:05.901)
And that’s okay because when you do that and you make those mistakes, you’ll then have a better idea of how to avoid them in the future. So it sounds like you guys have an amazing flow individually and collectively and that’s, it’s special. So congrats, keep going.

Hooked Like Helen (51:21.069)
Thank you. And we’re not perfect. We’ve been working on what we have now for a while, both husband and wife and career. So we’ve adjusted things as we’ve gone to get to where we are. And we’re still adjusting today to get better and stronger. But I really liked what you said, though, about that of it just being like a…

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (51:40.63)
You know what?

Hooked Like Helen (51:44.981)
you’re in a better situation, it might not be perfect because I think that’s what a lot of people, I think that might be the moment sometimes for a lot of people when they do relapse is they’re like, well, my life sucks still, you know, and it’s like, yeah, but it could suck more, you know, and you, it’s a journey. It’s not like this forever, you know, and that’s another thing that we say to the college students a lot, because when you’re young like that, you don’t have that sort of perspective on like,

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (51:57.558)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (52:03.949)
100 %

Hooked Like Helen (52:14.874)
Like we were saying, our kids, we blink in their 18, right? The college students, feel like, if I feel like this right now, it’s just gonna be forever. And it’s just like, it’s so not true. Life actually is long. You just have to keep moving forward and understanding that there will be downs and there will be ups.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (52:25.762)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (52:40.077)
That’s the thing is inaction is the single worst thing you can do. I believe that momentum movement action is the only choice because even if 80 % of the time you’re making the wrong decision, at least you’re qualifying out those wrong decisions. You’re getting closer to what it is that is the right decision. This is a really stupid thing. This is what I was looking at before. it’s John, because you said the words and for me, they’re so important.

Do you guys remember this like MTV show called Robin Big? It was with the skateboarder. So Robin, what was his name? Dyrdek. had this, his bodyguard slash best friend was Christopher Big Black Boykin. And he always just said, do work. That was his catchphrase was do work. And I love that. It resonated with me so much. And that’s, that’s what I’m always telling myself now. Like, yo, what are you doing? Do work, go, come on.

Hooked Like Helen (53:10.712)
Yes.

Hooked Like Helen (53:24.461)
Yes.

Hooked Like Helen (53:35.705)
I loved that show and I think he’s passed away. Did you say that? my gosh, was he so fun to watch though. His personality and their friendship was most like, I’m just gonna say adorable thing in the world. They were so great. Yeah, no, I watched that show and I really liked them a lot. And yeah, I remember him saying, work, do work.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (53:35.712)
And the same thing applies.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (53:40.919)
Fortunately, yeah, yeah, yeah, he did.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (53:48.833)
Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (53:54.274)
You

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (54:04.545)
You see the hidden beauty of reality television. There are some gems.

Hooked Like Helen (54:09.73)
Yeah, yeah, he’s good. think Rob, I’m pretty sure he was from Ohio. I think he’s a Cincinnati guy or was born here. I remember them visiting his childhood home in Cincinnati in one of the shows.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (54:21.963)
That’s really cool. So I mean, I appreciate your candor and your transparency. This is exactly what I could have like hoped this conversation would have been. Let’s talk a bit about, if you guys are down, let’s talk a bit about music. Cause you know, we’re all in this crazy music industry. work with independent artists all the time. We’re always asking like, what’s the solution? What’s the the tips, give me some answers. There are none. It’s all of it. You got to do work.

Hooked Like Helen (54:49.474)
Yep.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (54:50.913)
What are some of the things that maybe you have experienced in your career as independent artists or maybe things that you absolutely cannot live without in order to function at the level to book shows, to perform, to generate revenue? Like what are the indie musts?

Hooked Like Helen (55:10.194)
Everything, like you said, there is not just one thing. If there was, it would be a bazillion dollar secret. Because it’s everything. It’s always move forward. Don’t ever stop moving. Yes, that’s the number one. Don’t like the worst thing. The only like times when we ever felt like, my gosh, are we like.

not doing this, you know, our like was when we were waiting for somebody else to do something or whatever, you know, like when we when we were like, let’s not release or let’s hold off on that or whatever it was thinking that we needed something else to fall into place. And it’s like, yeah, it’d be great if it was a perfect case scenario. But that’s like never going to happen no matter what level you’re at. So you just have to like go, go, go, go, go, go. I mean, not be reckless and stupid. mean, we’re I’m a perfectionist. I’m trying to make

sure the mix is correct, the arrangement is right, I got the great take, we, you know, got the video, all of that stuff, you know, but at the end of the day, you have to like check in with yourself and be like, am I doing this to the point where I’m like stalling, you know? Like am I not? Sometimes you just gotta get it out there, you know, and you just gotta keep moving forward. So like, don’t wait for anybody else to do it for you, nobody, you know.

People come in and they elevate the project, but no one’s gonna save you. You have to just always be true to yourself and your vision and continuing to do work. Yeah.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (56:41.175)
Yeah.

My, my business partner lands. Who’s also one of my best friends. He taught me and also reminds me of this phrase or expression. Sorry. Don’t let perfect be the enemy of great or don’t let great be the enemy of good. Meaning like we can spend all this time fine tuning something. Is this already solid enough for us to get this out?

the door. Do we have to waste this time perfecting this more? Or is this really good? Get it out and let’s focus on the next thing. Because that other thing will naturally improve over time. Sometimes you just got to let it go, Like a kid, let it go and mess itself up in the playground a bit.

Hooked Like Helen (57:23.778)
Yep. Yep. 100%. I mean, we’re dealing with that this week, actually, with we have a visual that we filmed that I edit our videos. So I was looking at the footage and I was like, my gosh, like maybe we should film like shoot another day this weekend to kind of create this like, you know, other concept thing, B-roll, whatever other storyline. And we were like, cause it would be so much better if we did that. And then we’re like, okay, that’s going to throw so much stuff off. If we do that, it’s going to put this behind it. And we had to like, just kind of say, you know what?

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (57:50.06)
Yeah.

Hooked Like Helen (57:53.741)
We’re gonna make a great visual with what we have. Maybe it would be better if we had this other storyline thing happening, but like. But what we have hits the mark. Yeah, it hits the mark of the quality that we’re looking As long as you hit that mark that is your quality standard, sometimes it’s best to just let it go. Absolutely.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (58:11.169)
Yeah. So it sounds like having like a specific standard to hold yourself to is also important for you guys.

Hooked Like Helen (58:17.75)
Yeah. Yes. Yeah. We feel like we’re really, there’s no reason that, you know, we shouldn’t sound, you know, sound and look and feel like the, like what we want to listen to. So we feel like it’s gotta be as good as like the stuff that we buy, you know? Yeah, we’re trying to. And that’s what we’re shooting for. We’re trying to compete with the big dogs. Right.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (58:40.985)
my, my last question, at least like main talking point question. So I’m doing everything that I’m doing, I’m doing because I just feel like I have to. talked about purpose and passion. The Japanese term is Iki guy is just like, it’s the thing. This is my reason you guys have your reason.

But with that, there are other things. Like, I really want to help. I really want to give back. I wish I was a billionaire just so that I could go out and help everyone as much as possible. Is a crazy example. You guys are passionate about creation and music and putting art there. Is there like a secondary purpose that maybe was accidental? Is it about?

you know, the message of trauma and whatnot. Just tell me a bit about that, you know, what, what, where do you see yourself? Where do you see yourself in 10 years? What’s your ideal outcome?

Hooked Like Helen (59:39.289)
I mean, yes, it’s the music itself can help people. We’ve witnessed that and it’s been an honor and it’s been amazing. So that’s purpose there, extending it out in the way, the very like, cut and dried way of like, we’re having a mental health discussion and Q and A at a college. Like that is a huge extension for us on our purpose. So where we see ourselves is just continuing to grow

this project in order to have the means and the platform to help more people. And I know that sounds so like, wow, but like it’s, it helps us. It helps me and my soul to feel like when I lay down at night that I’m helping other people. So. And I’m sorry to interrupt, but it’s kind of like you said, like you just have to do it. Like we both, and we’ve talked about this, Nikki mentioned it, our cat is interrupting, but.

We’ve always had this thing, like even when we were kids, like where we knew at a certain point, okay, we have to do music. It’s what we’re gonna do. I know that’s why I’m here. I’m doing it. I never had this thing in me where I was like, I wanna be a star. I wanna be famous. I wanna do rock to get all the chicks. It was never about being rich. It was never about any of that bullshit. I didn’t know what it was about. Maybe it was just about the attention. I don’t know. But then when we started helping people,

Then it clicked. Then it’s like purpose. OK, so now I maybe that’s why. And that’s like the best reason why ever. Not to sound holier than now. Like that’s not what I’m trying to do, but that’s literally it. Like that cognitive dissonance of being like, OK, I care so much about doing music. Is it because I just want all these things? Because like, you know, fame or attention? Because actually, no, I’m like I’m making decisions that are probably bad for the project because I’m feeling cringe about that stuff.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (01:01:35.636)
Hooked Like Helen (01:01:35.674)
So it’s like, what’s going on here? What am I trying to do? And then once we started going out and playing these songs on tour and meeting the fans and connecting with them and realizing that we could make even a small difference, that was when it was just like, okay, now it makes sense. And then that’s when we started going very hard on everything.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (01:02:00.014)
I it. I appreciate your time. really grateful for the candid conversation. You guys obviously have a lot going on. There is touring, there’s speaking, there’s an album. July 14th, is that accurate?

Hooked Like Helen (01:02:16.491)
August 14th is the EP. No, I might have said something wrong. 14th is something, right? Maybe. don’t know. Sounded right to me. August 14th is the release show and that is when I believe we should be releasing the EP, Lend Me Your Ear from the title track.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (01:02:17.569)
Not July.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (01:02:33.138)
This is what we’re talking about. It’s okay to make mistakes. You just have to own it.

Hooked Like Helen (01:02:36.28)
Oh, yes, just roll with it. That’s no problem. Oh, no. Give me another second to drop it. And pin it a little bit.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (01:02:45.675)
Well, I really appreciate it. You guys are lovely and I wish you and your family nothing but the best. The music too, but family first.

Hooked Like Helen (01:02:55.838)
Thank you. same to you. This has been really awesome. Yeah, great. I appreciate your time and great conversation. Yes, amazing.

Chr1stoph3r G0nda (01:03:03.393)
That’s what it comes down to. That is the point.

Have a conversation, use your words, get your feels out there because you’ll realize that most of us on this floating rock in space are the same and that our politics, prejudices, social foibles, whatever it is, are so irrelevant because we all just want to come home at the end of the day and spend time with our loved ones and be a good neighbor and enjoy life. I think we’ll get back there. I’m very happy for the trajectory of humanity.

a few bumps along the way, I think that the long term outcome, sorry, long term outlook is positive.

Do me a favor, hook like Helen, and give us the final word, the final sage advice that you want to share to the world.

Hooked Like Helen (01:03:56.726)
love yourself. Yes. Just double that. You deserve it. yourself and love someone else. You’re worth it, you’re loved, and things do get better. Yes. Boom.