Mandi Crimmins has a special connection with her fans, and it’s exemplified in her new EP, BORDERLINE. This is her official musical statement to the world, a concept record that delves into mental health, and the highs and lows that go along with dealing with such issues. The singer-songwriter does not hide the fact that she suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder, and in fact she embraces it, using it as a tool to connect and relate with her listeners who may be dealing with similar conditions. Introspective in nature, and highly emotional, BORDERLINE is highly confessional, with more chaotic, energetic euphoric points, but also darker, gloomier moments.

Originally from Massachusetts, Crimmins moved to Los Angeles to chase her dreams and goals. Since relocating, she has really honed her sound and musical persona, a raw grittiness that her fans are really receptive to. It was actually during the writing of BORDERLINE that she was diagnosed, so writing became therapeutic to her, a way to alleviate the stress and tension of whatever was weighing on her mind. It is her hope that her music can touch listeners and inspire them to soldier on and seek help if they are struggling. She hopes others can feel the same kind of validation she has garnered from her own music.

Joining us today is Mandi Crimmins herself to take us through a track-by-track rundown of BORDERLINE, zeroing in on the background and detail behind each wonderful album cut.

1. “MELTDOWN”

“‘MELTDOWN’ is a song for those overwhelming moments when you’re about to lose your control and have a breakdown. It sonically captures what a meltdown feels like inside. I co-wrote this with my girlfriend using real texts we had sent during a meltdown and poetry written during one as well. It’s fierce, cathartic, and is perfect to scream from the top of your lungs.”

2. “PARANOIA”

“‘PARANOIA’ is my ode to anxiety and all things fear. As someone with Borderline Personality Disorder, I know first hand how my thoughts can ‘lie to me’ and bring me to this paranoid state where I feel like I cannot trust anyone or anything, including myself. I wanted the listener to feel what that feels like in my body.”

3. “EGOMANIAC”

“‘EGOMANIAC’ is an angry song about narcissists and toxic self-serving people. With BPD, I can sometimes split on people, meaning I go from ‘you’re the best,’ to ‘I hate you’ really quick when something happens. I wanted to let myself write an angry song when I was splitting on people, to show how jarring it can even feel within ourselves. I also really just know too many narcissists and needed to call them out (laughs).”

4. “BREAK ME DOWN”

“BMD is the most vulnerable on the EP. It’s a song written about how deep depression can get, and this desperate feeling that accompanies that begs for you to be ‘let out’ of this dark depressive state.

“When I get very low, I dissociate and lose myself. It feels like I’m trapped inside my brain watching myself and I can’t get out. This feeling drove me to write ‘BREAK ME DOWN.’ The piano lick is actually an old instrumental piece I had written in about 2015 that my girlfriend heard and begged me to develop.”

Mandi Crimmins ‘BORDERLINE’ EP album artwork
Mandi Crimmins ‘BORDERLINE’ EP album artwork

5. “ILY, DON’T LEAVE”

“‘ILY, DON’T LEAVE’ is a love song written through the lens of my BPD. It’s both joyous and uplifting, as well as tinged with the fear (of abandonment) anxieties, and self-deprecation that can be present. I’ve never been able to relate much to love songs because they didn’t feel relatable to me as a queer neurodivergent girl with mental illness. I wanted to write a love song.

“I realized that if I feel that the current popular love songs out now lack this level of relatability for me, then there must be other people who also feel like that too. This song is for them! For the lovers who want a high-energy relatable love song that admits to fears amidst immense joy.”

6. “meltdown – stripped”

“I wanted to end with the same song that the EP begins with, but with a whole different sonic vibe to it. I wanted to show the emotive journey the listener/artist goes on with the original ‘MELTDOWN’ being so in your face, fierce and passionate, and that very same song being a somber melancholic ballad, with just as much power to it but turned internal.”

Author

Born in 2003, V13 was a socio-political website that, in 2005, morphed into PureGrainAudio and spent 15 years developing into one of Canada's (and the world’s) leading music sites. On the eve of the site’s 15th anniversary, a full re-launch and rebrand takes us back to our roots and opens the door to a full suite of Music, Film, TV, and Cultural content.