For her music, Montreal songwriter Laraw delves deep into her personal feelings for the recent single “This Is How I Lost My Friends” (Sony Music Canada). She explains, “Last year was fucked. I just stopped talking to everyone because I had nothing left to say. People who’ve known me for a while know that I don’t like going out or hanging out with anyone to begin with, but last year was different. I needed someone to ask me how I was doing and no one did, no one could really, we were all going through it.”
Watch the official music video for the single and read what Laraw had to say to us about the song in our recent conversation.
Thanks for your time. How is life treating you today?
Laraw: “Pretty good, the sun is out, I’ve been writing a LOT of songs and chilling at home with the dog.”
Let’s talk about the new single then. It comes from some hugely personal experiences you had over the last year. How did it help you write the song?
“All my songs are based on actual events. A bit dramatized for the wow effect, but still very true. I think I realized I’m more on the loner side and that it is ok. The people that aren’t in my life weren’t meant to be in it right now. I tried to change in the past and it made me sad because I was pretending to be someone I wasn’t. I like to be home and chill. Going out and being with a lot of people really stresses me out and I don’t know why. It’s very weird to be afraid of losing everyone yet wanting to be alone.”
You talk about shutting people closest to you out over the past year and how fucked the last year was. What did you learn from your experiences over that time?
“I honestly believe it made me happier to realize it was totally normal. I really struggle with addressing my feelings and people who actually are in my life know that. I love them and they know. They won’t leave me because I’m struggling. And if they do then they don’t deserve to be in my life.”
Do you have any regrets from the last twelve months and, if you could go back to the start of it knowing what you do now, what would you do differently?
“I regret opening up to people who didn’t deserve my trust. I think I was looking for people to fill a void because I thought I was losing everyone. Now I realized everyone was going through it and I should have reached out to my closest friends instead, or even my mom, you know.”
If you heard that one of your friends was going through something similar, what advice would you give them?
“The most personal experiences are usually the most relatable. You’re not alone, and as cheesy as it sounds, time really does heal and make things better so just hold on. ”
Moving forward then, life is starting to return to normal. What are you most looking forward to?
“Eating at restaurants.”
On a musical note, the single is out, what else can we expect from you in the next twelve months?
“More songs about poor life decisions I made.”
As we’ve said, the theme of the single comes from very personal experiences. Do you always write from such a personal place?
“Yes… Music is kind of my therapy, if you want. It really is my only way of expressing myself.”
You’ve said that you don’t like going out or hanging out. Away from music, what makes you happy?
“Playing video games, eating at restaurants, going on walks in the woods, my dog.”
You started out studying music production and sound design. Who or what inspired you to move in front of the mic?
“Deep down I always wanted to be a singer but I always thought it was absolutely insane. I had a lot of people believing that it was possible. My friend/mentor Tim Buron who actually produced my first singles, believed in me so blindly I was like well ‘Ok, let’s do this.’ So I did. And here we are…”
You describe yourself as lonely but happier than ever. How do you feel you are different as a person now to that anxious person over twelve months?
“Still very anxious. But I’m trying to be more grateful for what I have instead of looking for things I don’t even need. I have THE BEST family and a small circle of friends that I’d die for. My dreams are coming true. I am very grateful.”
Sum your 2020 up in one short sentence…
“Scary but ultimately the year that made me ‘grow the fuck up’ the most.”