Listening to Enemo J’s Miley Virus is kind of an incredible experience. It makes me wonder just how this band managed to go back to the year 2006 to make formulaic, bland metalcore.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate this record. I didn’t hate the kid that no one in class liked. He’s already unpopular, there’s no need to dogpile.

But the truth also needs to be said: this is one of the worst releases of 2015. Dumb band name? Check. Bad pun of a pop star’s name (as an album name no less)? Check. Record scratches? Check. Djent-esque riffs at odd intervals? Check. The most formulaic metalcore possible? Check. The word “bitch” said over a brief pause before every chorus in a song? Check. Bad album art? Double check. To that last point, let’s look at that for a second. You guys couldn’t collectively spring for proper fake blood? On your fifth fucking album? Jesus Christ. The only way the album cover wouldn’t be a complete waste of time is if it’s an actual shot of the person on the cover smiling because they’ve just killed the whole band.

From the intro track, with its awful sample of The Drop, to the rigidly executed and drawn out breakdown at the end, this album is one long, slow, grinding trainwreck. And not the good kind. This is every band you’ve seen at a local show that are so god awful you’ve had to avoid eye contact with them, cross your arms, and retreat into your mind to temporarily disassociate from their brand of out-of-touch nonsense.

Enemo J? More like Enemy of Taste.

Track Listing:

01. Intro
02. This Is Not A Toy
03. Miley Virus
04. Five Percent
05. This Stops Today
06. Ides Of March
07. Majora
08. Throughout
09. Sufference
10. Time
11. Drunk Lions At The Wolf Party

Run Time: 42:20
Release Date: October 1, 2015

Check out the song “Time” here.


Communications Manager @ V13. Lance Marwood is a music and entertainment writer who has been featured in both digital and print publications, including a foreword for the book "Toronto DIY: (2008-2013)" and The Continuist. He has been creating and coordinating content for V13 since 2015 (back when it was PureGrainAudio); before that he wrote and hosted a radio and online series called The Hard Stuff , featuring interviews with bands and insight into the Toronto DIY and wider hardcore punk scene. He has performed in bands and played shows alongside acts such as Expectorated Sequence, S.H.I.T., and Full of Hell.